Yesterday at 9pm, the IBIC staff hosted the inaugural IBIC Frequent Flier Banquet – a banquet to honor students who spend all their time at the IBIC. The banquet was held in a secret underground location in the IBIC and was attended by ten students who had received special invitations on Thursday afternoon. One IBIC staff member who spoke on condition of anonymity said, “I frequently walk around making note of those students who spend all their time here; obviously this is where they come to, to have fun”. The ten students (Africa: 1, Latin America: 2, Asia: 4, Europe: 1, North America: 2) had spent a total of 1,840,279 hours at the IBIC last trimester alone. One of the Asian students in attendance confessed that after he overheard two IBIC staff members discussing plans of the banquet, he decided to quit going to class and started spending all his time at the IBIC so he could earn more IBIC points. Although he felt bad for missing class, “the banquet was worth it”.
The students were asked to name their favorite dish from their hometowns and first class chefs from Singapore, France, South Africa, Peru and Canada were flown in to create the dishes. The student from Africa, who wished to remain unnamed so as not to make her friends jealous said, “People often have to travel for months on zebras in my country to get one of the spices used in my meal. The meal was incredible! I wish I could I have shared it with my friends but it serves them right for spending too much time at the Pub”. Although most of the students were elated to be invited to the banquet, one of the ‘students’ from North America was confused about why he was invited. “I have been living in the IBIC for quite some time now, ever since I decided to stick it to the man and stop paying rent. I guess I was mistaken for a student, probably because my picture has been posted numerous times on the facebook page, Sleeping Birds Hall of Shame”.
Many of the students I spoke with said it was a night to remember and encouraged everyone to start accruing points. For those interested in becoming frequent fliers next trimester, Wes, head librarian said, “counting has already begun for the next banquet, so I encourage everyone to start camping out at the IBIC and ditch the Pub, especially on Thursday nights”. Adding with a hint of contempt, “what has the Pub ever done to reward you for showing up?”